Winter Roadtrip – This is gonna be a long one…

Ahh,… what a wonderful time for a mother/daughter roadtrip through lovely winter snowscapes of the Northwest.

Fastforward to reality…
Aaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!!

With a whole lot of help from my sweet ex-honey, Ken, (ok, he did it FOR us), we hooked up Lisa’s little Dodge Neon on a dolly behind a U-haul, to make Lisa’s big move from Meridian, ID to Portland, OR. We left Ken’s house about 9:30 am.

Knowing that there was going to be snow up in the Blue Mountains, (between La Grande and Pendleton), I took all the precautions I could possibly think of in preparation for winter storm driving. We had on warm winter clothes, we had heavy coats, hats and gloves. We had blankets, bottled water and high protein snacks. I made arrangements to call Mom before we started up into the Blues, and again on the other side, so that if the 2nd call didn’t come, she could call out the Cavalry, or the National Guard, or Ken, and have them come find us on the mountain! I even bought chains for a vehicle I don’t even own, knowing they’d never fit anything I DO own. I felt confident that I had taken all possible precautions for a safe and successful winter trip.

On our way out of town, we had to stop by the storage unit to get a few more of Lisa’s things. When we opened the back of the truck to add more boxes, we found Lisa’s car and house keys lying on the bumper. They had made the trip from Ken’s house to the storage unit teetering on the edge of the U-haul’s back bumper.

Lisa drove the first leg of the trip. Things were fine until, just before La Grande, we started hitting a few slick spots on the freeway. Lisa is not big on winter driving, in fact, you might say it REALLY rattles her. After seeing 2 cars that had gone off the freeway into the briar pit, (one upside down), Lisa quickly resigned as driver. Poor boo-boo. I didn’t realize how much of a city girl she really is! I learned that Lisa has never even been in the mountains in snow before!

I took the wheel at La Grande and after refueling we headed onward and upward, into the Blue Mountains. Lisa sat forward in her seat, one hand on her seat belt, the other on the dashboard. I was fully expecting a lot of snow and nasty road conditions, but I didn’t want to scare Lisa more that she already was, so I tried to sit back and look as relaxed as I could while still remaining very alert. The nasty roads never really materialized. It was snowing, and the wind blowing snow around made visibility low in a few places, but the road remained basically just wet.

We passed the sign announcing the summit elevation and, (after explaining that ‘summit’ meant ‘the top’), I got a big sigh of relief from Lisa, but she still hung on like we were on a roller coaster. (There are permanent fingernail marks in that U-haul’s dashboard, and I don’t think that seat belt will ever un-crinkle either.)

Unfortunately, just before we headed DOWN the other side, the snow started to stick to the road. I KNEW that because we were about to head down it wasn’t going to be on the road much longer, but I saw ALL the truckers pulling over and putting on chains. There was an electronic highway sign saying all big trucks and vehicles towing needed to put on chains. DAMN! Passenger cars were still going by without chains.... Hmmm, where did a little U-haul pulling a Neon fit in? Well, far be it from me to second guess the professionals, with Lisa’s eyes still big as saucers, we pulled over with the truckers to put on the chains. (sigh…) But it wasn’t that bad, you’d have been proud of us. I crawled around under that little truck like I knew what I was doing, and Lisa was a good little assistant. The wind was just howling, and every car that went buy sent chunks of ice, snow and dirt into my face, but we got those chains on!

We continued on our way, and of course, within a mile, the snow was gone off the road, and we were on pavement again. The problem now was that driving on pavement will break those little chains almost immediately,(they aren’t as macho as big truck chains), and then you’ve got a chain beating the hell out of the underside of your vehicle. So until I could find a safe place to pull over to take them off, I had to continue down the hill, driving over in the briar pit where there was some snow. That didn’t sit well with Lisa, and the fingernail marks deepened in the dashboard.

At the first wide and straight spot in the road, I pulled over to remove the chains. It appeared to be fairly clear of blowing snow, so I figured we were fairly sheltered from the wind. We dawned our coats, hats and gloves and opened our doors to get out. WHAM!!! The wind hit my door and ripped it out of my hands. I thought it was going to flip around and go right through the front fender!!! I had to use both hands and all my weight to get it shut. Lisa had a similar experience, but it wasn’t quite as bad on her side of the truck. We literally had to hang on to the truck to stay on our feet. I have never been in winds that strong before!

The chains had been on just long enough to build a real good layer of ice, snow and mud and rocks. Getting them off was not as easy as getting them on. (But I remember that being the case when I’d put chains on my PT cruiser.) With the wind blowing so hard, my hat kept blowing down over my face, and my hood was pounding the side of my head. Lisa and I both had to crawl around in the crud to get the job done. I was impressed with my little daughter, when push came to shove, she tucked away that ‘city girl’ and got right down in there! She was a real trooper! Again, every car and truck that went by sent more crud all over us. But finally, muddy and very wind blow, we crawled back to the cab. I had to use both hands, with my foot against the inside of the door jam, to get my door shut! Whew!!! Lisa and I turned and looked at each other and just started laughing!!! We’d done it! We kicked butt on the Blues!

From what I understand, conditions up there worsened, and they closed the Blues a few hours later.

We stopped briefly in Pendleton to clean up and grab something hot to drink. We had mud on our faces and even though we had gloves on, our hands were sopping wet and gritty. Lisa took over driving again.

In The Dalles, we stopped at McDonalds for something to eat. Those golden arches never looked so good. While we were eating, Lisa turned her head, and I saw a big glob of mud inside her ear! We started laughing again.
When we pulled in to McD’s, there was no place to do a “pull through” parking job, so I knew I was going to have to back up the truck and dolly to get out. We just parked long ways, taking up several parking spots near the edge of the parking lot. I’m not good at backing a trailer, but I can do it if I have to. Usually. If the trailer cooperates. But it didn’t. When I tried to back out, the frickin’ wheels on the dolly would not turn backwards! They just skidded and made a horrible noise! We ended up having to go through McDonalds drive through in the wrong direction. Lisa went in and told them what we had to do, and she and a customer stood at the entrance to make sure nobody came in until I was through. Thank god the U-haul was short enough to fit under their canopies.

Lisa took over driving again, and other than really heavy rain, the trip was fairly uneventful, until we stopped at Troutdale, just east of Portland, for gas. Not being used to a big vehicle and trailer, pulling into the gas station, Lisa clipped the concrete post by the pump. No big deal, except it required backing up, which that dolly didn’t like to do. Fortuately, three bored guys at the gas station took on the task of figuring out the problem. The fender on the dolly was touching the wheel when we tried to back up and stopped it from turning. So they pried the fender out for us. We got our gas and headed for home.

We got to the house here about 7:30 pm. Neither of us has ever been so happy to see home! After clogging the drains in the showers, we both hit the sack early.